9 Topics To Discuss With Your Partner Before Having a Baby

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familyBefore my husband and I started planning to have a baby we talked about a few key topics such as, is this the right time to have a baby, what do we think of our finance situation, how many children should we have, and should I go back to work after my Mat leave. So many things to think about, when planning to have a baby and for the most part we missed a few key topics that were discussed much later.

Here are a few key topics to discuss with your partner before having a baby.

1. Finance situation

Babies aren’t cheap. On average a new mom could spend up to $6,000 the first year. Depending on whether you want high end baby gear or just regular priced gear. Plus if you are given baby gifts, that helps too. No matter what, saving a little, building a budget and researching what to purchase is going to help any new parent.

2. Baby items

What baby items do you need or what baby brands are you most interested in having? Brand is a big one, especially since there are so many baby brands for the same product. It’s difficult to know what brands are better than others or cost more for the same thing. I know that my husband and I talked a lot about getting cloth diapers vs disposable diapers. Cloth diapers are one baby item that is not only expensive but there are so many different brands out there. I had to really do my research for that item!

One of the best online stores I found for Cloth Diapers is Cozy Bums.

3. When is the right time to have a baby

I believe there is never a right time to have a baby, so the perfect time is when you actually have the baby! Life gets busy and it’s way too hard to determine when is the best time. For the most part, many couples I know do try to plan it, whether its after marriage or purchasing a house, there is somewhat of a plan but its never the right time. Until you have the baby!

4. Who will be the legual guardians

Before my daughter was born, we spoke about this often considering that we were finalizing our WILL and we needed to put this important information in it. For any new parent this is an crucial topic, since its about who will look after your children. Whether you are building a WILL or just acknowledging the idea of this, it’s an important one to think about before you have children.

4. Schools  – where and what schools

Private or public? Or Catholic or public? Did you review your neighborhoods schools? I know my husband was on that one – he looked up what schools had the best results in our region. I didn’t think of that until he started doing his research on the schools. It’s important to read, especially if you have many schools in your area.

5. How many children in total are we planning

I think this is one of the top topics that comes up with every couple. For me, I always wanted at least two children, but if I could do three or four I would. However, my view on this question was, lets see how it goes –  start with one and now two and we can go from there.

6. Childcare

This is a hot topic –  well for many moms who live in Ontario, Canada. Childcare is expensive and hard to find! So many questions to ask, even if you are planning to have family care for your child. And if you are considering daycare, well that’s not easy to find and finding one that you like is even more difficult. I got very lucky with my daughter – who now loves her daycare. I interviewed 6 different daycare places and each time, I was not impressed. Whether it was the cost, facilities or even the atmosphere. So I decided to start looking for a home daycare and wow, I found one that I loved very quickly. So when do you start looking for childcare? What is your budget?

If you’re looking for Daycare, an online site called Daycare Bear is amazing! That’s were I found my daughter’s daycare. It’s a Canada wide site, that filters from babysitter to home daycare and daycare organizations.

7. Support roles

Do you have family that lives close by? Who do you want help from? Can your friends and family help with cooking or prepare meals for you, after you deliver? Is there additional support for new moms in your community? Think about who is willing to support you the most and who is close by. It’s very important to have family and friends close by and willing to help for the first few weeks after having a baby.

8. After mat leave – whats next?

Are you planning to go back to work? Are you planning to go back to work part-time or full-time?

9. Disciplining

How do you plan to discipline your child? Who will discipline your child? What are the roles of grandparents disciplining your child? Many different views and takes on this topic and it’s important that you and your partner are on the same page, especially many grandparents sometimes what to take charge one this.

If you are looking for tips on discipline and the differences between mommy and daddy discipline there is this great article called Mommy Discipline vs Daddy Discipline.

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NaraP

Nara is a mom to one and soon to two, an improving baker, a wife, a soccer player and a fun traveler. She loves the mom/work lifestyle, with a jam-packed schedule that always involves playing with her daughter and chatting with other moms. Nara considers her writing style, a casual form of speech of stories and experiences that move forward naturally.

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3 Responses

  1. Great tips…. Financial planning is always important for a healthy living! Thank you for sharing Tanya!
    — Jacky

    You might also enjoy this post from JoyfulSavings: Do Not throw away that lotion tube . . . until you Do This!

  2. Esther says:

    It can be very difficult to determine when to actually have a baby until the baby arrives. That was exactly what happened us when we had our first baby. We were planning to have a baby much later before we realised what was happening I was already pregnant.

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